"puuuuuuuuuuuuut"
Never in my whole life of twenty years and two months less five days have I farted this much. So it calls for a celebration.
That's right. Today marks the beginning of my personal public holiday and it shall be known hereon as FartsDay or F-Day. It isn't much of a name to commemorate such an occasion I know, but, it's a name.
Not that during FartsDay you'll fart your ass off all the way to India. You can do that, if you can. But the idea is similar to a Death Anniversary. You just commemorate it.
You'll never believe how much I farted today. Even now as I type, I've farted once.
It all began with my first bowel trip in the morning at White Sand's toilet. I felt the first call for watery-bowel movement at 6am when I left NUS for Pasir Ris. I tahan-ed a journey of 15mins bus ride and 50mins mrt ride all the way until I reached Pasir Ris Interchange at 7.20am. But alas, it was to be that the toilet was crap. Early in the morning some more knn. So I had to walk to White Sands Shopping Centre and prayed along the way the toilet would be better. It worked and F-Day was founded since.
The 7 minutes I was inside, 4 minutes I was farting away. They were loud, long and sounded like beginner's violin. Really, never have I heard such rhythmic fart in my whole life of twenty years and two months less five days. Each fart lasted an average of 5 seconds, so much so that it was scary. 5 seconds each, total of 4 minutes, you do the math. Ok minus off a bit of interval. Still, it was horrible. I lao sai-ed. I have no idea why, probably the immediate switch to mainland food was the cause, since I performed guard duty the day before. Just last wednesday I was diagnosed with mild food poisoning. And now this.
I was in time to assemble for the stupid Army excursion, and even bought a Sausage McMuffin with Egg. The time to assemble was 7.30am, but people came late blah blah blah and we waited for dunno what for one hour. And I felt that the second wave neared.
This time I used the interchange's toilet successfully.
My friend offered to wait outside till I was done, but knowing myself, I was making history so I rejected his offer. True enough, 10 minutes later I came out. Exhausted from the symphony. "puuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut". it was longer than you could pronounce that. I kept having a pleasant surprise when I expected the fart to end and yet it continued.
About 9am, we were about to move off to our chartered buses. Now why the hell did we have to assemble so early for? I could have hugged Mindy for longer.
And that's not all. Our company 2IC suddenly startled everyone with this piece of news. It wasn't our excursion timeslot and it was supposed to be at 1pm. Now now this deserves farting at right. A big commotion which I think could have evolved into a riot if not for the weather took place.
"Anybody has anything on this afternoon?"
Everybody shot up their hand/hands. Myself included of course. Genuine case la.
We were told that the excursion would be cut short. Duh. Which I think didn't happen btw.
My PC allowed me to go off for SIA class. But i got softhearted and decided to cling on to my dear platoon. Damn.
We hung around the interchange for a good 15minutes before we decided to go Bugis. To the arcade, and sight-seeing.
Why mention all these? Cos the next wave is nearing.
Upon reaching Bugis, I decided the first smart thing was to find a toilet. It was about 9.30 then. Bugis starts its crap at 10.30. So the point is that many places are either in preparation, or out of bounds. My friend and I recce-ed the whole of seiyu, only to find 7 out of 7 toilets in "washing in progess" status. and we were locked from the inside. wtf. We had to backtrack to The Edge, and take the lift back to parco's amusement centre at B1. Yes that particular toilet was one of the 7, in fact the first. Fortunately it was done up already. However the cubicles had no toilet papers. But hooray the papers were free-for-all just outside. However the paper sucked as it broke off the sections each time I pulled. MAnaged to take a bunch and that marks the 3rd wave. As usual, my friend got out of the toilet first and I was still farting away. Again a bit of lao sai.
Good thing was that when I was done the arcade was operating.
Played Dungeons and Dragons with another friend. It was a good experience. Been years since I played that game and completed it with one token. I spent about $2.50 this time, and caused a bit of trouble to my friend as well.
It was 11.40 by the time we came out of the arcade, and it was time for lunch. Which I shan't comment.
Reached pasir ris at 1pm and set off to somewhere in Changi called Changi Prison Musuem. It was the 60th anniversary, see, anniversary, of the end of war. Crap crap crap and finally we ended up at the NEwater visitor centre. We conducted our last Ulysses company water parade with NEwater. Bout 4pm we set off for Pasir Ris.
I sang the last Rong Shu Xia and Ai Pia Jia Eh Yia on the bus with the guide's mic. Everyone sang too. Was the only fun part of the whole damn trip.
Finally reached Pasir Ris at 4.30 and I went to Tampines to buy mooncake. Stomach was already starting to churn up the next wave by the time I was done. It was 5.30 then and I boarded the bus home. Ended up oversleeping and alighted at Bendemeer market to meet Dy for dinner. After which I rushed home to keep the cakes and rushed back to ska.
Yes the first thing I did was to continue the last wave for the day. Another 10minutes of heaven and it was 6.50pm.
Training was rather dull. I was sort of under supervision to teach the orange belts. Other trainee instructors too but I seem to receive the most commentaries. Hmm what's wrong with Mr wong.
had supper with Dy and now i'm back home, starting this blog at 11.45pm. It's 15minutes to 1am but that doesn't mean F-Day is over. The first day is always slightly special. Because right now the next wave is coming up.
After which i'm gonna consume last week's charcoal pills. And have a well-deserved rest.
Have a good F-Day everyone and good night, or morning.
Oh yes. It's time to check my posting. Monday is nearing.....and this is probably the last post before I go back to Army life. Take care.
That's right. Today marks the beginning of my personal public holiday and it shall be known hereon as FartsDay or F-Day. It isn't much of a name to commemorate such an occasion I know, but, it's a name.
Not that during FartsDay you'll fart your ass off all the way to India. You can do that, if you can. But the idea is similar to a Death Anniversary. You just commemorate it.
You'll never believe how much I farted today. Even now as I type, I've farted once.
It all began with my first bowel trip in the morning at White Sand's toilet. I felt the first call for watery-bowel movement at 6am when I left NUS for Pasir Ris. I tahan-ed a journey of 15mins bus ride and 50mins mrt ride all the way until I reached Pasir Ris Interchange at 7.20am. But alas, it was to be that the toilet was crap. Early in the morning some more knn. So I had to walk to White Sands Shopping Centre and prayed along the way the toilet would be better. It worked and F-Day was founded since.
The 7 minutes I was inside, 4 minutes I was farting away. They were loud, long and sounded like beginner's violin. Really, never have I heard such rhythmic fart in my whole life of twenty years and two months less five days. Each fart lasted an average of 5 seconds, so much so that it was scary. 5 seconds each, total of 4 minutes, you do the math. Ok minus off a bit of interval. Still, it was horrible. I lao sai-ed. I have no idea why, probably the immediate switch to mainland food was the cause, since I performed guard duty the day before. Just last wednesday I was diagnosed with mild food poisoning. And now this.
I was in time to assemble for the stupid Army excursion, and even bought a Sausage McMuffin with Egg. The time to assemble was 7.30am, but people came late blah blah blah and we waited for dunno what for one hour. And I felt that the second wave neared.
This time I used the interchange's toilet successfully.
My friend offered to wait outside till I was done, but knowing myself, I was making history so I rejected his offer. True enough, 10 minutes later I came out. Exhausted from the symphony. "puuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut". it was longer than you could pronounce that. I kept having a pleasant surprise when I expected the fart to end and yet it continued.
About 9am, we were about to move off to our chartered buses. Now why the hell did we have to assemble so early for? I could have hugged Mindy for longer.
And that's not all. Our company 2IC suddenly startled everyone with this piece of news. It wasn't our excursion timeslot and it was supposed to be at 1pm. Now now this deserves farting at right. A big commotion which I think could have evolved into a riot if not for the weather took place.
"Anybody has anything on this afternoon?"
Everybody shot up their hand/hands. Myself included of course. Genuine case la.
We were told that the excursion would be cut short. Duh. Which I think didn't happen btw.
My PC allowed me to go off for SIA class. But i got softhearted and decided to cling on to my dear platoon. Damn.
We hung around the interchange for a good 15minutes before we decided to go Bugis. To the arcade, and sight-seeing.
Why mention all these? Cos the next wave is nearing.
Upon reaching Bugis, I decided the first smart thing was to find a toilet. It was about 9.30 then. Bugis starts its crap at 10.30. So the point is that many places are either in preparation, or out of bounds. My friend and I recce-ed the whole of seiyu, only to find 7 out of 7 toilets in "washing in progess" status. and we were locked from the inside. wtf. We had to backtrack to The Edge, and take the lift back to parco's amusement centre at B1. Yes that particular toilet was one of the 7, in fact the first. Fortunately it was done up already. However the cubicles had no toilet papers. But hooray the papers were free-for-all just outside. However the paper sucked as it broke off the sections each time I pulled. MAnaged to take a bunch and that marks the 3rd wave. As usual, my friend got out of the toilet first and I was still farting away. Again a bit of lao sai.
Good thing was that when I was done the arcade was operating.
Played Dungeons and Dragons with another friend. It was a good experience. Been years since I played that game and completed it with one token. I spent about $2.50 this time, and caused a bit of trouble to my friend as well.
It was 11.40 by the time we came out of the arcade, and it was time for lunch. Which I shan't comment.
Reached pasir ris at 1pm and set off to somewhere in Changi called Changi Prison Musuem. It was the 60th anniversary, see, anniversary, of the end of war. Crap crap crap and finally we ended up at the NEwater visitor centre. We conducted our last Ulysses company water parade with NEwater. Bout 4pm we set off for Pasir Ris.
I sang the last Rong Shu Xia and Ai Pia Jia Eh Yia on the bus with the guide's mic. Everyone sang too. Was the only fun part of the whole damn trip.
Finally reached Pasir Ris at 4.30 and I went to Tampines to buy mooncake. Stomach was already starting to churn up the next wave by the time I was done. It was 5.30 then and I boarded the bus home. Ended up oversleeping and alighted at Bendemeer market to meet Dy for dinner. After which I rushed home to keep the cakes and rushed back to ska.
Yes the first thing I did was to continue the last wave for the day. Another 10minutes of heaven and it was 6.50pm.
Training was rather dull. I was sort of under supervision to teach the orange belts. Other trainee instructors too but I seem to receive the most commentaries. Hmm what's wrong with Mr wong.
had supper with Dy and now i'm back home, starting this blog at 11.45pm. It's 15minutes to 1am but that doesn't mean F-Day is over. The first day is always slightly special. Because right now the next wave is coming up.
After which i'm gonna consume last week's charcoal pills. And have a well-deserved rest.
Have a good F-Day everyone and good night, or morning.
Oh yes. It's time to check my posting. Monday is nearing.....and this is probably the last post before I go back to Army life. Take care.
posted by I'm searching no more at 11:45 PM
